Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Conversations with my sister in law

First of all, I want to say sorry for just dropping off the face of the earth. It really does feel like there isn't enough time in each day to do everything that I say I would like to do. I make a list of things I want to blog about and sort of just don't get to it by the time I have some "me" time. After I put D to bed I just want to unwind by reading a book, watching tv, writing or just vegging out. I hate that I put my blog last but sometimes relaxing my brain is the most important thing. :)

That being said I want to let you guys know about this conversation I had with my sister in law that completely blew my mind. Actually, it fucking completely blew my mind. It was THAT mind blowing. Now if you have been following this blog for a while you probably already know that my sister and I do NOT see eye to eye when it comes to parenting and raising children. Seriously its like night and day, hot and cold, sane and insane. I tend to think that I am more on the sane side of things while my sister in law is on the insane side. Why?

Well my sister in law is now in Florida and we had this conversation on Thursday of last week. It kinda came up with, "So are you guys ready for Florida" and her reply was "Yeah most of us are ready." "Oh, who isn't ready yet?" She went on to mention how her sister had booked the tickets out of the wrong airport and that her son's girlfriend would be joining them.

Now I'm really sorry, call me old fashioned, call me stupid, call me whatever in the hell you want to call me but bringing your 16 year old son's 15 or 16 year old girlfriend on vacation with you to another country is just insane. It's really really fucking stupid if you ask me. I mean, taking a girlfriend on a vacation is a huge responsibility, especially taking a girlfriend on vacation in another country. I still find it incredible that the girlfriends parents ALLOWED her to go on vacation with her boyfriend.

Then what floored me was this comment from my sister in law: "Well I'm not really happy about it but my son and his cousins wanted her to come."  Um excuse me are we seriously allowing a 16 year old BOY and his cousins that don't even live in the house to make decisions in your house? Is this for real?

I spent the following hour telling my sister in law that I thought she was insane, that although I like the girlfriend I do not think that it is appropriate for a girlfriend or boyfriend to go on vacation with the family at that age. It's like throwing them a box of condoms and saying "Yeah, uh, I'll pretend to not know what is happening okay?"

I have a feeling that one day issues that we see on Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant will be a lot more than just on TV for people who believe this is "ok" and "normal".

So how many of you have taken or would consider taking your child's boyfriend/girlfriend on vacation.


  1. It would not be happening in my family. Sixteen is too young for a child to even have that serious of a relationship, so I can't imagine condoning such behavior. I wouldn't allow my son's girlfriend to spend the night in our house, nevermind travel with us on vacation. What sort of parent would allow that for their daughter? Do they WANT to become grandparents soon?

  2. Hi Jenny -

    First off thanks for the comment and following my blog. It's good to know that other families like mine are out there! :) I just wanted to let you know I am returning the favor and following you back.

    Wow. I tend to agree with your point of view on this one! And wouldn't the girlfriend feel uncomfortable? I mean... I know I would have... and how long could they have possibly been together if they're 16? The relationship can't be that established (added to the fact that they are TEENAGERS!), so it just seems... odd. But whatever. Too each his own!

    Look forward to hearing/reading more from you! :)

  3. Maybe not on vacation.

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  4. I had a SIL who let her 13yo daughter bring her boyfriend along to holiday dinners. Yes, at 13! They would sneak off to the bathroom and the other pre-teen kids would giggle and talk about it. I finally told my brother that it was inappropriate. It didn't stop. My niece went on vacation with his family when she was 13.

    My twins--almost 19 yo--have barely had girlfriends so I can't say I've ever had to deal with this directly. But I agree with you that it is a huge responsibility to worry about another teen on a trip!

    I write a lot about whose the boss in your family--you or the kids. Some parents don't get it!

    Love this post, by the way!
    xo Susie

  5. Just now, read yr post & I agree with almost every thing U said ...

    Thou, I might be too young to comment but am really quite amazed that parents of 15 or 16 y/o boy/girl can think like that ... Weird world to say the least.... (No disrespect Meant to any one)

    Its great that U find time to blog... Thou, I know its so very hard to find time when U have a young one, because even my elder sis has a 6 month old son & a 4 y/o daugter & they keep her helluva busy... Its even hard to eat food with babies, at least I can vouch that ;)

    Keep posting when ever you get time & ya, u r a genuinely gifted writer as I tweeted yesterday too :)

  6. I wanted to say thank you for stopping by my blog and commenting... I am now following and I look forward to reading more of your stuff.

    I have my weekend 6 in 1 blog hop going on right now (runs all week long, and resets Friday afternoon. Find it under the tab)... where you can link up your blog, twitter, facebook, networkedblog, blogfrog and giveaways. You should swing by!

    All the best,
    A Spicy Boy, A Cat, and My Fat Ass

  7. Irresponsible, cowardly parenting at its finest. Sounds like she needs to put on those big girl panties, take back control and start making better parenting decisions. Unfortunately, this really is a real-life Teen Mom/16 and Pregnant episode just waiting to happen.


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